Aloha from Hell!

Wish you were here…

wls

  • I have been feeling very low for the past few days. I have stopped caring about my health. I am drinking sugary sodas again. I just feel hopeless. And I can’t make myself care right now. Why didn’t I have the fucking surgery? If I had, things would be going…

    ,
    , ,

  • I didn’t hear back from the weight loss center today, they always get back to me the next day. It gives me a little hope that maybe they’re thinking about my email and didn’t answer “no” immediately. That’s a positive sign, I hope! I went to JoAnn and looked at…

    ,

  • Today I went to my doctor and got more crappy news. I gained like 8 pounds in a very short period of time (depression eating) and my a1c went from 6.7 to 9.2. Great. Mom obviously feels bad about the surgery thing and called down there today and left a…

    ,

  • Sigh. I’m not going to get another chance at surgery…I bawled. Don’t know what I’m going to do. I really needed this.  

    ,

  • The weight loss center got back to me, they’re going to talk to the surgeon about it next week. Let’s hope he’ll decide to give me one more chance. I got the shirts I ordered off Etsy, they look great. I got one shirt of The Mission and one of…

    ,
    , ,

  • Is it bad that I’m thinking of contacting the weight loss center again? Mom would flip her shit. I’m gonna think about it for a couple days but I think I might mention it to her tomorrow. It’s my life, after all. I’m not happy, and unhappy people don’t succeed.…

    ,

  • I got the results from my GeneSight test! It looks like I do need a change in medication. Two of the important meds are in the yellow zone (there’s green, yellow and red, you want your meds to be in the green). I need to give these results to my…

    ,

  • Mom is REALLY trying to talk me out of surgery. I am so confused. I don’t know what to do anymore. Feeling pretty useless and directionless. I really want to sort my Ohuhu markers (all 320 of them) but I don’t have the energy or motivation. I just want to…

    ,

  • Today is the first day of the liquid diet and I hate it more than last time. I keep thinking “what am I gonna eat for dinner?” And then realize I can’t. Then I think “I really want some chips” and realize, again, that I can’t! It’s so annoying! The…

    ,
    ,

  • Had a telehealth appointment with the psychologist early this morning, and it went well. I believe I’m all cleared to have surgery and I start the liquid diet Saturday. It’s only 5 days this time. I put up a landing page on my “Nemi’s Anime Valhalla” site http://nemi.anime.nu  It’s named after…

    ,